Suggested Onion headline: Nation’s basketball fans scramble to remember where, what TruTV is
Since early February, I have had two thoughts about this year’s ISU men’s basketball team: They can lose in the first round of the NCAA Tournament or win until they get steamrolled by Kentucky.
Well, either option is still theoretically possible, but if the latter happens, it will be at a level never reached by ISU basketball.
To add on to my post from last year: In the 2014 Sweet 16, ISU played the closest anyone did to eventual national champion UConn on a not-really-neutral court. Iowa State has lost to the eventual national champion in four of its past six appearances. This year, it’s a true neutral site, ISU’s the high seed, and nothing can possibly go —
Hampton may not win a game in this year’s tournament, but news of their bid did aggravate every Iowa State fan’s long-dormant 2001 trauma, which is a victory unto itself.
If the lost-in-Lubbock Cyclones show up, UAB has a happy pick-me-up from the cancellation of its football program. If the second-half-of-Oklahoma-in-Ames Cyclones show up, the sky’s the limit. (If ISU and Iowa meet in the Sweet 16, the whole state might burn down. Like, literally literally. There won’t be a Veishea to riot at, remember.)
Here’s to not giving Jamie Pollard and collective Cyclone Nation another heart attack. (Please.)