Sep 12

Orlando columnist still really, really hates Iowa State

During Conferencepocalypse, Orlando Sentinel columnist Mike Bianchi questioned the justification of multiple non-blue-blood teams, including Iowa State, in major-college football. Well, more than questioned. He railed to anyone who would listen (and those of us in existential angst) that teams that “could not compete” should be expelled in favor of the University of Central Florida — a place that barely over 30 years prior was known as Florida Technical University and didn’t have a football program.

In 2014, as the realignment dust was settling, Bianchi outright called on the SEC to “get[] rid of the irrelevant schools” — specifically, Ole Miss and Mississippi State — and, purely on the basis of media markets and “growth potential”, pick up one team that less than 20 years prior was playing in Division I-AA and another that 20 years prior didn’t exist. That came four years after he had apologized to the state of Mississippi when Mississippi State defeated a ranked Florida team in the Swamp.

As the 2010s come to a close, Bianchi, now with the sword of UCF’s pillowy-soft alleged national championship at his disposal, refuses to stop taking massive dumps on Iowa State and its undistinguished-on-the-football-field compatriots.

It’s no secret that many of these bottom-feeding Power 5 programs are simply taking up a spot that would be better suited for UCF — a burgeoning university in a major metropolitan TV market.

He also plays fast and loose with timelines, saying “those Power 5 leagues were formed nearly 100 years ago.” But:

  • The ACC didn’t exist until 1953.
  • The primordial ooze of the Pac-12 can be traced to 1916, but along the way, the conference ceased to exist in a pay-for-play scandal, only to be reconstituted in a way that the only university that really got screwed was Idaho.
  • Texas Tech — one of his go-tos for a team that doesn’t belong — didn’t start football until 1925, was in the Border Conference along with the Arizona schools until the mid-’50s, and then shifted to the Southwest Conference.
  • The Big 12, though it disavows the existence of anything before 1996, is for all intents and purposes a descendant of the Big Six/Seven/Eight. I’ll grant that. But I’ll also point out that politicking in the Texas Legislature as SWC schools fought for lifeboat space is how it got to where it was in 2010.

According to the 2019 U.S. News & World Report rankings, UCF is tied for the 165th-best national university in the country, lower than every member of a power conference except Louisville, Mississippi State and Texas Tech. (Iowa State is 119th.) If there is any bulwark against the view I was seeing a decade ago (and Bianchi continues to trumpet) about how it is all about the football eyeballs, it’s that UCF remains where it is.

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Sep 11

Iowans really, really hate the current license plate

A couple of days after I was seeing “blackout” style license plates showing up in regular alphanumeric sequence, WHO had a story about expansion of the program.

The blackout plates rolled out on July 1st, and Lowe said just a few months in they’ve sold almost 10,000 of them, raising almost $400,000.

Iowa has too many specialty plates, period. The “city and country reboot” voted for over two other kind-of-middling options at the Iowa State Fair is just different enough from the 1997 version that they’re mismatched. Admittedly, being saddled with a strip in that shade of mid-2010s green, or close to it, doesn’t help.

I don’t think either design has ever been super-popular, but this is pretty much an outright rebellion. Remember, the “blackout” plates are here because people kept buying Dordt College University plates and covering up the identifiers.

And now Johnson County can’t keep them on the shelves (KCRG) — which may be more for Hawkeye-related reasons.

Personally, I think the ideal plate was the white-on-blue 1986 series, not (just) because I grew up with them, but they were simple and unpretentious — and embossed, which we don’t get anymore. In that sense, the blackout plates are merely trying to return to that. Maybe we should go full-on Delaware and make them not just basic but hereditary. (We can’t truly do that because Iowa’s too big. But you get the frustration.)

UPDATE: Polk County sold out of blackout plates. And Linn. And, almost a week ago, Cerro Gordo.

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Sep 10

100 years of St. Joseph’s Fall Festival

Last week was St. Joseph Catholic Church in Chelsea’s 100th annual fall festival with chicken and ham dinner. The Homegrown Iowan website has a writeup about the event, held the Sunday of Labor Day weekend.

I don’t think we went to this often — if at all — and it sounds like we’ve missed out on a lot.

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Sep 09

Against all odds, GameDay coming to Iowa State

This started as a very different blog post.

In all the early speculation about “College GameDay could come to Ames!” — see here, and here, and here — I was certain that there was no way it could possibly happen.

I was wrong. It just required a massive confluence of events.

  • Weeks 2/3 can be a desert in terms of college football programming, even below SEC Cupcake Week. The high-profile non-conference matchups happen early, and conference games are scattered at best. Iowa-Iowa State (no, not the name certain corners of the Internet want to give it) is the only regular non-conference series of note in the Big Ten.
  • ABC’s Saturday night game is Clemson at Syracuse, a conference game, and ESPN play-by-play announcer and Syracuse alumnus Sean McDonough will be calling it. But Syracuse got trucked by Maryland. ESPN’s night game is Florida-Kentucky (always has to be early in the year because Gators can’t stand the cold), and Kentucky hasn’t beaten Florida at home in more than 30 years.
  • Another potential GameDay matchup, Stanford at UCF, would fit the “offbeat” game profile, but ESPN had already cashed its Orlando chip at Disney World for Week 0 and Stanford’s game against USC was so late that when a decision had to be made, it wasn’t known if Stanford would be a ranked team next week.
  • Because this year’s schedule has an extra week and idle Week 2’s are stupid, Iowa State didn’t have any new data point after beating a I-AA team in triple overtime while Nebraska blew a 17-point halftime lead in front of a home crowd at Folsom Field. (You read that correctly.)

The research I did is still good, but the conclusion has to be modified to take into account new data. So, rather than how “GameDay” was never coming to Ames, here’s just how unlikely it had to be.

Of all the college football fan bases out there, Iowa State’s should be one of the most understanding of a 21st-century sports maxim: ESPN programming exists to support “the ESPN family of networks.” That also means talking about the College Football Playoff, and when not talking about the College Football Playoff, asking, “What about this team that might make the College Football Playoff?” (This guy gets it.)

With the help of the NCAA’s list of College GameDay sites crossed with lsufootball.net’s comprehensive TV schedule archive (in God’s Own Time Zone, of course), I set to work compiling a spreadsheet of every GameDay site, matchup, and network in the 2010s.

Statistics are for nine years, 2010-18.

  • Of 161 GameDay events, 12 were stunt GameDays with non-power-conference teams (two were actually non-games, Times Square and the NFL Draft), 33 were conference championship games or BCS/CFP games, and five were Army-Navy. So we’re down to 111 data points.
  • 78 of those 111 games had a top-five team playing, and 18 more had a top-ten team playing.
  • 64 were on ABC or ESPN at 6 PM or later. Iowa State has never ever played Saturday night on ABC or ESPN in the modern television era. ISU played Nebraska in 2006 on Saturday night on ABC to a not-quite national audience — the only such game until 2020.
  • 33 were non-ESPN family — but 14 of them were the CBS SEC Game of the Week and six more were LSU-Alabama CBS night games. So, really, we’re talking about 13 games ESPN had to make an extra effort for. THIRTEEN.
  • GameDay went to one game where both teams were unranked: 9/10/11, Notre Dame at Michigan, on ESPN. Those 13 games in the above bullet point? Two of them are the Irish, and Iowa State will never play Notre Dame (unless in a bowl).

The complete list of “College GameDay” power-conference games, 2010-present, not on the ESPN family of networks not involving a top-10 team:

  • 10/12/13, #12 Oregon beats #16 Washington, 3 PM on FS1
  • 9/24/16, #14 Tennessee beats #19 Florida, 2:30 PM on CBS
  • 10/20/18, #25 Washington State beats #12 Oregon, 6:30 PM on Fox (the culmination of a 15-year campaign to get GameDay to come to Pullman)
  • 9/1/18, #12 Notre Dame beats #14 Michigan, 6:30 PM on NBC
  • 9/14/19, #20 Iowa at unranked Iowa State, 3 PM on FS1

Congratulations, “College ‘Ames’ Day.” See if Jim Walden is bringing the Washington State flag.

CORRECTION 9/27/20: One game has been on ABC prime-time this century. It has been noted above.

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Sep 06

Get ready for lots and lots of Rutgers

The untold millions (it is millions, right?) of Rutgers football fans will be turning their eyes toward Iowa City soon.

For the second time in Big Ten Conference history, and the first time in Kinnick Stadium, the Hawkeyes will play the Scarlet Knights.

And they’ll be back. Starting in 2022, for six years, Rutgers will be Iowa’s every-year crossover opponent. This was, reportedly, “random”.

Iowa fans will console themselves over this turn of events with many 28-3 victories in a bath of television revenue money, while complaining about having to play Iowa State.

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Sep 05

A Lincoln Highway marker caretaker passes on


August 24, 2013: A Lincoln Highway marker on Johnson Avenue NW in Cedar Rapids. US 30 used Johnson on its first alignment.

In an ode to a 102-year-old “Queen of Johnson Avenue” in Sunday’s Gazette, the writer mentioned this nugget:

Dorothy was very proud of the four-foot stone Highway 30 marker — one of the last ones of its kind in the area — located at the edge of her yard. It stood for decades and only came down recently when Johnson Avenue was being widened.

I realized I likely had photographed this very marker when I spent multiple days traveling the Lincoln Highway in Iowa in 2013.

Consulting a lost mystical text of the ancients called a phone book, I found what I was looking for. Dorothy Gongwer (listed, as is not uncommon among women of a certain age, under her deceased husband) held on to this piece of transportation history.

Johnson wasn’t widened, per se; it got turned into a two-lane with bike lanes and roundabouts. I hope that wherever the marker is, it will be taken care of as Dorothy took care of it.

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Sep 04

North Tama continues college football tour

On Friday, North Tama will be playing in its fourth college stadium this decade.

The first, of course, and the one everyone’s always trying to get back to, is the UNI-Dome. The second was Wartburg College in Waverly in 2013. The most recent two, though, were unplanned.

Last year, North Tama played Wapsie Valley at Upper Iowa University in Fayette because Wapsie’s field was flooded out. More special attention came as it was named a Game of the Week, and the Redhawks came out on top. (The T-R‘s description is wrong; it was a district game.)

This year, Lisbon’s football field is under construction after passage of a bond issue, so this “home” game for the Lions against the Redhawks will be played at Cornell College in Mount Vernon. (The KWWL story said Lisbon would be playing at Coe, but more recent information changed that.)

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Sep 03

Watching an Iowa legend ply his craft


August 16, 2019: Bob Dorr (left) performs “Elvis in Paraguay” with three Elvis impersonators who crashed the concert at the MidAmerican Energy Stage at the Iowa State Fairgrounds.

My Iowa State Fair day(s) have typically ended with hypnotist Ron Diamond (except last year) and a shuttle ride around the campgrounds. But this year, when I looked at the schedule, I noticed Iowa music legend Bob Dorr was down for a gig at the end of the night.

I know of Dorr, and that his Blue Band officially wrapped up a 30-year-plus run in 2018 but he appears to be plugging along (when a couple old bandmates appeared, “we call it Deja Blue”). But I had never seen Dorr, and I figured that this would be a good a chance as any.

I was not disappointed.

A rotating group of more than a dozen musicians rocked the free stage for an hour and a half, including a 16-year-old who played about a quarter of a song behind his back(!). And then the Elvis impersonators showed up (top).

IMG_0572
Bob Dorr (drum set) plays with some of a 16-person rotating set at the Iowa State Fairgrounds.

It may not have been a concert geared toward the young. But then, the Grandstand that night was someone who is more bro country than not, and I’ll take the talent Dorr and his crew showed off over that.

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Aug 30

A weekend to root for the Redhawks

Football? Football!

It’s Week 1 for high school and college football seasons.

North Tama (preview here) is expected to do well this year. This time, the team had a full offseason with one coach; Mr. McDermott unretired in 2018 when the previous coach jumped ship to become an assistant at Iowa’s newest megaschool.

ISU is playing UNI, again, but this time the game was optioned for national coverage and this could be the first opening-weekend 11 AM Saturday kickoff.

And the Hawkeyes are playing Miami, not the Miami that nearly upset Florida last week on a drive consisting mostly of pass interference calls, but the other Miami, in Ohio. That team is the RedHawks, with a capital H, something that has caused occasional consternation for those of us who have to remind people that North Tama doesn’t do that.

This is the fifth time Iowa has played Miami (OH). The MAC school is the only non-power-conference team that Iowa has done a 2-for-1 home series with. The game was played there in 2002 (Iowa won). There was an almost-qualifier five years later, when Northern Illinois’ side of a 2-for-1 was played at Soldier Field (Iowa won).

But since then, and especially now that the Big Ten plays nine conference games, Iowa ONLY pays for have-nots/lessers/poors to visit Kinnick Stadium. This is a stark contrast to certain other teams that do home-and-homes and then lose in double overtime at the Glass Bowl.

Go Redhawks, and go RedHawks.

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Aug 29

New Mississippi River bridge in Louisiana (no not that Louisiana)


July 12, 2016: The now-former US 54 bridge across the Mississippi River, whose replacement was built right beside it.

My string of unbroken Mississippi River crossings was clipped on Aug. 3 when a replacement for the US 54 Champ Clark Bridge opened at Louisiana, Missouri. Story: St. Louis Post-Dispatch. This is the only crossing between Alton and Hannibal.

The next replacement across the Father of Waters will be an easy one to get, the I-74 Bridge in the Quad Cities. But also by the end of next year, US 63 will have a new span at Red Wing, Minnesota.

It’s debatable among hard-core roadgeeks, or at least me, if one bridge built right beside the other counts as a lost clinch. I can still probably say that I’ve traveled the highways in question unbroken. But when we’re talking major projects, like these — or the $6.4 billion San Francisco Bay Bridge replacement that did slightly relocate I-80 over the bay — there’s a “specialness” factor that doesn’t come into a little concrete span over a smaller body of water.

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